Childfree in Midlife: Why I Love My Life

midlife woman wearing a black sweater and sequins pants drinking a glass of champage and sharing why she loves being childfree in midlife

Motherhood is a choice. Some of us know we don’t want to be mothers from a young age. Some of us try to be mothers and can’t. Either way living a childfree life is different than one where you have children that you are responsible for. Now that I am childfree in midlife there are things that I wish I had realized during my childbearing years.

Others may think that we are selfish and self-centered. Maybe we are, but we can be. Motherhood brings a lot of responsibilities with it. Once you are a mother, you are one for many years. No returning those kids.

Before I spill the beans on why I enjoy my life in midlife you might want to check other posts I have written about this lifestyle.

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midlife woman wearing a white robe and standing in front of a bed with white linens, being childfree in midlife means time for self care

Why I Am Happy Being Childfree in Midlife

I will share with anyone my husband and I tried to have children. I put my body through lots of fertility treatment and with that came a lot of emotions and disappointments. It took me and my husband a while to realize that being childfree has some perks and positives.

Over the years we have heard friends talk about and lament about their lives with children. One memory that I will never forget was an evening with some neighbors. We were in our late 30s at the time and our friends were in their 50s. Their youngest was getting ready to leave for college and he said that he was singing “happy days are here again”. He was looking forward to being an empty nester while his wife was still on the fence about it.

Parenting is a hard job. My hats off to those people who have multiple children. How they juggle work, life, and raising a family is impressive. Our life is different. It is just the two of us and our furry children. Over 30 years of marriage and currently two cats I can say I like my life.

10 Reasons I Am Happy As A Childfree Woman In Midlife

#1 Time for Self-care

Self-care is not selfish. It is good for the mind, body, and soul. Not having children I have more time to indulge myself. I always joke that my workout time makes me a better wife and cat mom. I also have time for things like my nails, my skincare routine, and tub time with dead sea salts.

#2 No Diaper Changing

I can’t remember ever changing a diaper. Taking care of the litter box is close enough to that task for me. Seriously, this is something that I would have done 99% of the time. I have litter box duty 99% of the time. My husband “can’t take the smell”.

#3 I Set My Bedtimes and Wake Up Times

I am an early-to-bed early-to-rise kind of person. My 8+ hours of “beauty rest” every night are important to me. My schedule does not have to revolve around other’s bedtimes. If only I could convince my cat Fluff didn’t have to tell me how much he loves me during the night. At least that is only in the cooler months that he likes to lay on top of me.

#4 Vacation Schedules

I could not imagine having to vacation when everyone else vacations around school schedules. The crowds, the prices. Just not appealing to me. We joke that we do not go to the beach from Memorial Day to Labor Day. We made that mistake about 30 years ago and never again.

#5 No Fussy Eaters

I don’t have to worry about making special meals for fussy eaters. I have trained my husband to eat more vegetables and fruits over the years. Many of my friends talk about how they have to fix special meals for the kids and then what they want to eat. Can’t imagine having to do that all of the time. It’s hard enough to keep up with which flavors or canned food my cats “prefer”. At least they just turn their noses up in the air and walk off versus complaining.

#6 No PostPartum Issues

It is so nice not to have to worry about postpartum depression and other issues related to it. My mother had it and it affected my childhood. Also, I don’t have to worry about passing along other genetic issues to the next generation.

#7 Looking Forward To Life In Retirement Housing

I don’t know about you, but I look forward to living in a retirement community. It’s amazing how they are like living on a cruise ship 365 days a year. So many activities, ways to make new friends, and you don’t have to worry about taking care of the lawn.

#8 No Boomerang Kids

Most people think that once they get the kids out of college they are good to go. It seems as if we have so many people we know whose children leave the nest and come back for one reason or another. They can’t downsize because they still have adult children living with them. Their post-college-age kids are also still on “payroll”. They have given their kids such a nice lifestyle that their salaries can’t support the life they were used to. So they expect the parents to keep it up for them.

#9 No Need For A Tummy Tuck

Yes in midlife I can still wear a bikini. I joke that I can wear one better in my 50s than in my 20s. My diet and exercise routines are better and consistent in my later life than when I was trying to get pregnant. Also for a few years, all of those fertility drugs wreaked havoc on my figure. Now I have no one to blame but myself if I don’t like something about my body.

#10 I Get To Buy ALL Of The Dresses For Me

I will admit it. I have more clothes and shoes than a woman needs. Now, part of it is what I do. Blogging and influencing do take a large wardrobe. It is part of the job. The thing about it is I don’t feel guilty. I don’t have to worry about buying wedding gowns or wedding funds.

Finding Your Own Happiness In Life

Society sets so many expectations and norms about getting married and how life after marriage should be. Some women even choose not to marry. So whether you are single or married and wondering what life might be like later without kids I hope this was a different perspective than most take about living childfree in midlife.

Some may think that I am a self-centered person. Well, I have the time and means to be able to focus on me more than most women who are mothers. To me, it is just a difference in how I choose to spend my time. I applaud all of the mothers out there. Motherhood is a tough job. A job I never had to have.

Thanks, Let’s Keep In Touch

Thanks for stopping by this post. Being childfree is not always easy, no matter your age. It took me years to realize that I like my life and being childfree in midlife has a lot going for it.

If you enjoyed this post, you can also find me on Instagram and Pinterest. I would love for you to follow me there. I also have a newsletter that I send out every Wednesday and Sunday morning. In them, I share things that I don’t share on other platforms. I hope you will sign up by clicking here.

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